True Blood finale: awesome or what the bloody hell just happened? (spoilers)

The finale for True Blood’s fifth season aired last night. Instead of doing a full recap of this show, I’ll just give you some highlights that someone more motivated and organized than I am compiled. This show is somehow ridiculous, awesome and campy allat the same time and there’s no way I’m not tuning in next season to see what happened with crazy Bill, the evil Phoenix rising from the pool of ancient blood. A lot of vampires bit it in the finale, and enough remained to prove dangerous, particularly Bill. Bill is the new Russell Edgington, since we had the pleasure of seeing Edgington’s face melt. Other awesome deaths included Rosalyn dying after Sam shifted inside her (brilliant!) and Salome getting staked by Bill after he slipped some silver in her drink. I want to know why some vampires’ faces transform for a few seconds when they die and others just explode immediately. It seems to correspond with how central a character they are to the show.

Anyway here are some highlights from last night. We’ll have to wait until next year to see what happens, but you know Sookie isn’t going to die. “Must all roads lead to f’ing Sookie?” I’m with you, Pam.

Goodbye Awesome: R.I.P. Russell Edgington (Denis O’Hare). He was the absolute coolest. Psychotic and power hungry, Russell obviously had to die, but we will miss his perfect speeches and (sometimes) irresistible Southern charm. After some fairy light rays and quick action, Eric finally got his centuries-old vengeance. Eric saves Sookie (Anna Paquin) yet again.

Father of Fairies: It was only last week that Andy (Chris Bauer) slept with Maurella (Kristina Anapau) and found out that he was going to be a father. In one of the more hilarious ridiculous scenes, Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis), Arlene (Carrie Preston) and Holly (Lauren Bowles) are all on hand to witness the miracle of life and Maurella’s interesting reaction to birthing and post-labor. Surprise! Andy has four babies and it’s the father’s job to raise them. Peace out!

Bill Is the New Lilith: Bill’s arc throughout this season has been his path to religious fanaticism. He’s slowly and methodically weeded out the competition for top dog in this nuthouse. His final action was poisoning Salome (Valentina Cervi). And if you thought Bill’s crazy death explosion was shocking, so was his ascent out of the blood pool.

Shift and Rescue Operation: Adorable puppy Emma needs some rescuing. While Sam (Sam Trammell) tries to appeal to Bill’s non-psycho side, Luna (Janina Gavankar) skinwalks into Steve Newlin (Michael McMillian). Good plan, no? No! Steve Newlin is in a bit of hot water for killing some frat boys and has to go on TV to talk himself out of trouble. Meaning Luna does. But remember this shifting into humans is bad for shifters. Season six consequences, y’all.

Rightful Place: There’s a new sheriff in town. Alcide (Joe Manganiello) finally takes his place as pack leader. He’s hot and good at making speeches—he’ll definitely do well in his new position. Presuming he doesn’t go power hungry like Bill.

Rewind Moment: After some longing looks and a little banter, Tara (Rutina Wesley) and Pam (Kristin Bauer van Straten) finally make out. And there was a very brief Pam and Eric reunion. Presuming everyone survives to next season, we need more of our favorite Maker-Progeny. Pam and Eric have been separated far too long this season, it makes us hurt deep in our hearts.


[From E! Online]


I agree that the makeout session between Tara and Pam was awesome, as was Jessica’s reaction: “I knew it!” I paid no attention to the werewolf subplot, and the fairy birth scene was just mildly amusing, not hilarious. I did like how the peanut gallery at Merlotte’s kind of voiced our thoughts on how ludicrous yet entertaining some of this season was, particularly when they were watching TV and witnessed Steve Newlin shift back into Luna. Lafayette said “I did not see that shift coming,” or was it “sh*t“?


Also, what the hell was going on with Jason seeing visions of his dead parents and suddenly turning against all vampires? I mean he came through when it counted, and he didn’t kill the good guys, but I feel like his character is constantly getting the shaft. He’s smarter and more aware than anyone seems to give him credit for, particularly the writers. Jason already went through all this when he rejected the Fellowship of The Sun.


Next season, I see more of a lasting romantic relationship between Sookie and Eric, and I see Bill getting deprogrammed somehow and coming to his senses. I could be wrong, he could bite it or go into hiding like Russell, only emerging at the end of the season when they need another villain. I’ve read most of the books but I’ll be damned if I can remember the plot, which isn’t a guide to the series at all anyway.


If you didn’t get enough True Blood, HBO has a bonus scene available on their website. I won’t give away any details, but I will say that I enjoyed it and am looking forward to next season.